Friday, June 7, 2013

FTSF - The Long and Winding Road


Here I am back with another Finish the Sentence Friday.  Janine from Janine's Confession of A Mommyholic is hosting.  This is such a fun link-up.  I love reading all the finished sentences.  I am so amazed at the many original responses.  

This week's sentence is:

I hit a turning point in my life when I…


It's taken me a while to write this post as a sat and thought about where there were turning points in my life.  I thought and thought and nothing really stood out to me.  As I thought about my life I saw my life more as a series of curves.




It seems my life has been a very curvy road.  I don't really see it as making turns.  I believe I have been on the same road most of my life it has just taken curves to get around some of the obstacles along the way.  It's funny with the curves you can't see what's coming as you move along the road, so some things come at you as a big surprise.



At one point I came to a screeching stop.  That occurred with the death of my first husband.  I wasn't sure for awhile if I could get restarted.  The restart was very slow and bumpy.  I finally got back up to cruising speed, until the next set of curves came along.

I expect there will be many more curses along this road I call life.  I hope I have the ability to continue to navigate them.

I think maybe I made this post a little more serious than I intended.  I have been contemplating I few things recently.  I am thinking about the changes that are going to happen.  My youngest son graduates high school tomorrow,  he will move away to college in a couple of months.  I will be coming upon age 59 soon.  I haven't lived in my house without one of my children since I was 18 years old.  By having the huge age difference in my third and fourth child it has been a long road of mothering. My third child was a senior in high school when my youngest was born so there were no gaps.  It is just weird to think about.  I have had a lifetime of being a mother, who will I be now?



Also last night my older sons had to have their dog, Boomer, a huge black lab, put to sleep.  My sons have lived together for well over a decade and Boomer has been a constant companion.  Boomer was three days short of 14 years, 3 months.  He has been a part of my sons lives since he was a puppy.  They have been trying to decide when the right time was for over a month now.  The decision came quickly when he took a turn for the worse during the night on Wednesday.  They tried treating him for 24 hours, and after about 18 hours the vet said it wasn't working,

Boomer has been there for them through all the bad times over the last 14 years.  He has been a best friend to the two of them.  When they have had breakups Boomer was always there to comfort them.  I wish I had a picture of Boomer to post but I haven't taken one for several years.  Boomer was ready for a long and deserved rest.  

So, I think the events going on in my life have made me much more serious than normal.  Sorry if I depressed anyone.  Life's curves bring good times and bad times.  Sometimes they are combined, as in my son's graduation.  I am so happy that he has done so well, and he is ready to get on with his life.  I am also sad because that part of my life is changing.  I will so miss having him here all the time, but as I well know, life just keeps moving along.  I know that once he moves to college he will never be the same, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.  It's just hard for a mom and dad.  I may be moving into an area of the road where the traffic has thinned out and slowed down a bit.



On a good note, he received another scholarship yesterday at the awards program.  He got $5,000 for being the top boy scholar/athlete.  We were all happy about that!!!

I am going to concentrate on getting healthy over the next few months, and I am going to try to get my husband to work on his health.  I have noticed that he is gaining weight.  My son has also pointed out that dad is getting heavier.  My husband has been about 15 pounds overweight for the last few years.  Nothing major, but I think he is eating more and gaining weight because he is stressing over our son moving away.  He is really having a hard time with it.  I hope to get him more focused on his health.  The problem is you have to make that choice on your own.  When someone tries to pressure you it doesn't work. 

I hope to keep moving along the road for many years to come!!

17 comments:

  1. I so hope you are moving along this road for many years to come. And truly wonderful post. Huge congrats to you son on his high school graduation and for all his scholarships. Totally have such a right to brag and be proud. So sorry about Boomer and will keep your sons in my thoughts and prayers. And also hope you and your husband can get back to being a bit healthier, too. And thank you so much for linking up with us again. Enjoy the upcoming weekend now!! :)

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    1. Thanks Janine, I always enjoy your hop. The sentences are so much fun and though provoking. Thanks for remembering my sons and Boomer.

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  2. Blowing many blessing your way Betty. So many curves and sadness in your life. So focused on your story that I can't possibly finish the sentence. Your sons graduation will be a FRESH starting point in your life. Your next chapter is starting and a happy dance is due...

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    1. I guess I have had some sad times in my life, but usually I am very happy. I know there will be some adjustments. Probably more so for my husband. He has been upset just going through graduation festivities. I haven't been thinking about it too much, he will be home all summer.

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  3. You and your husband will have to start working on feathering your (soon to be) empty nest. It truly helps you take your mind off the sadness of the last child leaving. Instead of looking at in a 'look what we've lost' way, look at it as new opportunities for freedoms you have never had as a couple. Whether it's fixing up a room or the whole house, or planning a few little mini vacations of a more romantic (or at least focused on each other) nature....do the little things to spice your life up, and take advantage of the new freedoms and time that you will have re-gained/captured by having no kids at home! Look for the silver lining, my friend! You will surprise yourself! :)

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    1. I have a feeling my husband is just going to want to sit at home and not do much. I like to be active. My son and I have always done lots of things together. I guess I will have to rely on my grandsons now. I have told my husband we need to start reconnecting with friends that we haven't had time for in the last few years. We spent so much time with travel baseball that we didn't have much free time. I never stay down about anything for long so I know I will do fine. I may just have a few mopey days.

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  4. I think I like your take that instead of turning points, which may translate to turning away from something, you handled the curves instead. Ended up on the road you wanted just had to worry about that sharp curve ahead.

    Since I am in the have-young-children phase I cannot imagine them not being home. But I will say as much as I want Allie to fly the coop it will break my heart when she does.

    You will still be a mom, by the way. Just one that doesn't have to clean their room!

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    1. I am sure my house will be a whole lot cleaner. I have thought of that. My husband and I have joked about the things we won't miss. We may even miss some of those things for a while.

      Enjoy the years with your children at home, and on the days that they drive you crazy, remember they won't be there forever.

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  5. Betty, wow, I feel I could have written your words and thanks for sharing yours. My first husband died also. There is a time for everything and your time now is getting healthy. I so understand that and I know you can do it too, just as I know I can. :)

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    1. Linda, I really need to get to know you better. It seems we do have lots in common. I enjoy all your encouragement and have enjoyed reading your blog. Let's do this thing!!

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  6. I loved your "life curve" analogy with this post! And I always enjoying reading your perspective from the stage of parenting where you are now- it is so different from where I am with young kids, and I learn a lot from you!

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    1. Thanks Stephanie, I guess I can write from the voice of experience. It's funny, I have basically had two different families with the age difference of my children, and I have seen the generations change so much. Things were so different when I raised my older kids than when I raised my younger son. The love that you feel for your children never changes, nor the importance of giving them your time and attention.

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  7. Betty,

    you are a woman of substance and you will succeed!!

    Wishing you loads of courage, my friend!

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    1. Thanks so much Ruchira. I will take that wish and prove you right!!

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  8. wow, thanks for sharing, that was a touching post. I am so sorry for that tragedy in your life. You know I ask myself that all the time...who am I if I am not a mom? I have an only and am a little scared of when he grows and leaves, who will I be them? I hope that I can raise him to be a good man.

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    1. I am sure you will do a fantastic job. You are a wonderful caring mother. I have spent a lot of years being mom and I know I will always be mom. My older kids and I are very close. I know my younger son will stay close. I am not going to worry too much about it all until fall. I am going to spend the summer doing as much with my son as he has time for. I know he will be busy with his friends too and I certainly don't want him to feel like he has to humor mom. Realistically, I know there is another phase in life and I am ready for it.

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  9. You will be starting a new chapter in your life and I'm sure that it will be great. I am sorry for all the hard times you have been through, even though I am younger I have been through a lot of curves myself. I have always learned though that once the road starts to straighten out you discover all the new great things that you couldn't see when you where stuck in the bend. Good luck on the new phase of your life!

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Please take a moment and let me know what you think about this post. I love reading your comments. I try to answer every comment, maybe not immediately, but as quickly as I can.

Thanks!!! Betty