Moving From Home
Well, it has taken me 40 years to get to this point. I am going to have an empty nest. My older children are 40, 38, and 36. When my 36 year old left for college I had a baby who was under a year old and still nursing.
Now I am helping my youngest son pack to move from home. He will be moving in with a roommate at college. He has lived as an only child for most of his life. He has had two rooms or more since we had several bedrooms. He will be moving into a little room with another person. I'm sure he will be fine!
It's mom and dad who are nearing a breakdown. Today when we where taking things out of his closet it hit me that he would never really live here again. I know he will come home on breaks, but he will never really live here again.
It was all I could do to keep from just going into a total meltdown. I don't want him to feel guilty about leaving. I want him to be excited about the new opportunities that will be coming his way.
He is going to college and will learn who he is and what he really wants to do with his life. That is what we raised him for. We are so proud of him and I know he will do fine.
Our life has been focused on him for almost 19 years. He was one of those kids who never sat in his room alone. He spend time watching TV with one of us. He talked to us all the time. We all ate dinner together almost every evening. He has been active in sports his entire life. I can probably count on my hands the number of his sporting events that I have ever missed. I spent summers traveling with him to play travel baseball.
He has just been so close to my husband and I. He still comes into our room on weekends and sits on the bed and talks to us. My husband has been having an extremely hard time for a day or two. Now that things are being packed it makes it seem so real.
In a few days we will pack up everything and take him off to college. We will drive away and head home alone. We will go back to a house without any activity and a very sad dog will be waiting for us. She will miss him too!
I hope I can leave him without having a meltdown. I don't want to make him sad when we leave.
I have lunch plans the next day and plans with my daughter and grandson on the weekend. I will have to make plans to do lots of things over the next couple of weeks. This is going to be harder than I ever thought it would be.
My husband is the one who worries me. He wrote a letter to our son after he graduated to let him know how he felt about him. He is a very emotional person and takes things so hard. His mother has been really bad lately. We got through a spell where we though she was dying in the spring. She was able to pull out of that, but she is just getting weaker all the time. We took our son to see his grandmother on Sunday and when he left he said that will probably be the last time I get to see her. It's obvious that she is getting very weak.
If I don't write for a few days it will be because I am busy or I just don't feel like writing. I will try to write because it makes me feel better.